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It is written:
Psalm 11:3-If the foundations are destroyed, What can the righteous do?
Some years ago, I read an intriguing reference in a book by Lee Strobel. He pointed out that some modern day studies have noted a link between famous atheists and broken homes. While interviewing Lynn Anderson, he points out:
“Obviously, parents can play a significant role in shaping a child’s view of God. In fact, one study showed that most of history’s most famous atheists—including Bertrand Russell, John Paul Sartre, Friedrich Nietzsche, Albert Camus, Sigmund Freud, Madalyn Murray O’Hair, and Karl Marx—had a strained relationship with their father or their dad died early or abandoned them at a young age, thus creating difficulty in them believing in a heavenly Father.6”. (Lee Strobel, The Case for Faith: A Journalist Investigates the Toughest Objections to Christianity, 229 (Kindle Edition): Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan)
Strobel referenced a man named Paul C. Vitz, and I decided to purchase and study one of his books. He discusses this connection in detail:
“Looking back at our thirteen major historical rejecters of a personal God, we find a weak, dead, or abusive father in every case. Two prominent recent examples, O’Hair and Ellis, also provide support for this pattern. With the New Atheists, we see Dawkins with an experience of sexual abuse at age nine from a religious type of father figure during his separation from father and mother at boarding school; with Dennett, a dead father at age five; and with Hitchens, we note a relatively distant father, who was not especially successful, who lost his wife to a mushy-minded ex-priest seen as causing the death of Hitchens’ mother. In no case do we find a strong, beloved father with a close relationship with his son or daughter….To anyone who knows the history of modern philosophy and theology, the figures treated in this chapter make a very representative list of the prominent defenders of belief in God. These are many of the major theists from the seventeenth to the twentieth centuries: Blaise Pascal, George Berkeley, Bishop Butler, Thomas Reid, Edmund Burke, Moses Mendelssohn, William Paley, William and Samuel Wilberforce, François Chateaubriand, Friedrich Schleiermacher, John Henry Cardinal Newman, Alexis de Tocqueville, Sören Kierkegaard, Baron von Hügel, G. K. Chesterton, Albert Schweitzer, Martin Buber, Karl Barth, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Abraham Heschel. In the case of Butler, biographical information is limited. But otherwise, the preceding list is one of clearly positive father-son relationships—or of good father-substitute-and-son relationships. There is only one case of serious estrangement, Kierkegaard’s, which was resolved in a way that provides direct support for the present hypothesis. Kierkegaard’s reconciliation with his father led the great Danish thinker to express an understanding of how the father complex is related to belief in God. One other not unexpected finding is that, compared to the atheists, the theists appear to have had many more loving and supportive relationships throughout their adult lives. This tendency follows from our theoretical framework, since close positive relationships should be more difficult for both those with defective fathers (nurture effects) and those with autistic characteristics, however modest (nature effects; more on this below).” (Paul C. Vitz, Faith of the Fatherless: The Psychology of Atheism, 1146-1152; 1606-1616 (Kindle Edition): San Francisco, CA: Ignatius Press)
These studies point out the powerful impact that a person’s home life may have on their belief in God. This does not mean that there are not other factors that may impact a person towards disbelief in God: but it shows the stability of the home is a powerful contributor.
Recently, Jana S. Harmon wrote a fascinating book that goes into greater detail regarding this matter. She documents her personal research into the lives of fifty former atheists who have become Christians.
“Jason saw no need to seriously think about God because faith did not seem to make any practical difference in the lives of Christians he knew, saying, “I saw all the people around me living as if there was no God. My parents were nominally religious in that we said our prayer at night, but it wasn’t meaningful to anybody. It was just what we did. That’s where I decided that I didn’t believe it and there was really no need for me to really think about it.” General difficulties in life relationships, experiences, and events also created doubt and disbelief in God. Many decide either ‘God is not real.’ Or, if He exists, ‘God is not good.’ He is either not ‘there’ or if He is, is not ‘fair,’ their perceptions based upon certain expectations and disappointments. 12 Emotional abuse, physical abuse, abandonment, or absence of a father has been correlated with atheism, according to Paul Vitz. 13 Although healthy maternal and paternal relationships (10%) contributed to non-belief for some, troubled and/ or absent relationships with mothers (14%) or fathers (28%) created resistance to belief among a minority of former atheists in the study. Jacob was raised in a loving, active Christian home, believing in God and trusting Him as ‘caretaker.’ He looked up to his own father, a Christian leader and teacher, until his father abandoned the family. Jacob’s loss of trust in his own father transferred to his loss of trust and belief in God. He described the pain that led him to atheism: About halfway through middle school my family began to change. My family started not being as involved in the church. My father began to not come home as often. Eventually my parents divorced and that certainly hurt my faith, not perhaps at that moment but more so gradually without the leadership, the guidance on a daily basis. I didn’t see him for about six years. I didn’t understand why it could have happened or why it would have happened, why someone or parents who were so involved in the church, why this could have happened to them. That was very groundbreaking for me. I prayed for the relationship that they would not divorce, and then it did. So, I felt very unheard. 14 Jennifer recalled the troubled relationship with her father that distanced her from belief in God: I grew up not trusting fathers as I had been abandoned by mine . . . My father was in and out of our lives. He was gone quite a bit. And when he did show up, he was very difficult or violent or despondent or what not. So, by extension, I wasn’t going to trust a father, and certainly not an eternal father . . . I was working several jobs and supporting my family. My dad was in and out of my life. The road of my adolescence with him was rocky. This informed my distrust of any spiritual father, by extension. My mom was a single mom raising us and she was drinking at night. I was putting her to bed after she was drinking, and I was working through college. I was so busy surviving. Among those surveyed, prolonged negative life experiences prompted atheism in two-fifths (40%). Broken and depressed, David’s parents divorced when he was 14. An incident of perceived Christian hypocrisy was the final straw leading David to “give his life to Satan”: Some of it was personal experience with Christians. There was a time after my mom had kicked my dad out of the house and after they had been divorced. There was a mission fieldworker who came over to our house. I thought, ‘Whatever, that’s cool.’ I had some friends over for my birthday party. I was 15 or 16. At some point, I went to ask my mom something. I couldn’t find them. They were in the bedroom. I knocked on the door and walked in and they were naked. That left a bad taste towards Christianity. As a child, Gary was raised in a family that mocked and dismissed God and religion, saying, “We didn’t go to church at all. We didn’t pray. We didn’t acknowledge God as creator. At home, faith in God did not exist. We didn’t talk about it. We didn’t respect others who did. We didn’t respect them. God was mocked and He wasn’t relevant at all. It was like a big bag of nothing.” Compounding his view of an absent God was the reality of an emotionally absent, abusive father. He recalled, “We grew up socially going to church. The primary influence to get them out of it was my dad’s alcoholism. He was drunk every day. He wasn’t this loud furniture breaking alcoholic. Fifteen minutes after dinner, he would be asleep on the couch drunk. He was just absent. My dad never really addressed me, never really engaged me. I think when you are doing that and living that way, church doesn’t make any sense at all.” After a disturbing episode of sexual abuse at the hands of a neighbor, he admitted, “life got very dark for me,” and he began to seriously reject God, reflecting, As I started to get a bit older, I made a decision to reject God through these painful experiences. People would say, “Oh, God loves you.” Those messages might creep in and I thought, “If He loves you, there is no way this happens. This is ridiculous. These people are just dense. The idea that God loved you or cared about you. There’s no way in hell that that could be true.” I was so sad and shipwrecked underneath. When you have an alcoholic parent, it’s not a safe place to talk about what’s true. You don’t do sadness. You have to be tough and handle things on your own. So, the idea that there is this loving heavenly Father, it didn’t compute at all for me. At age 12, Adam’s parents divorced, undermining his sense of security. This experience along with perceived ‘trouble in the world’ made him feel disillusioned about life, prompting him towards distrust of authority figures who were viewed as uncaring, absent, or irrelevant. These experiences also paved the way towards his disbelief in God. He recalled, It appeared like every authoritative structure seemed to be failing me—whether it be my parents or the government or the church. They all seemed to be failing and so I thought it would be better for me to make up my own version of truth. I don’t think I made a conscious decision to do so until well after the fact. It seemed better to me to base things on my experience rather than to base things on failing institutions.” (Jana S. Harmon, Atheists Finding God: Unlikely Stories of Conversions to Christianity in the Contemporary West, 45-47 (Kindle Edition): Lanham, Maryland: Lexington Books)
It is very encouraging, however, to read of the many accounts of the persons interviewed by Harmon who eventually turned their lives to Christ.
“The purposes of this book are many. Altogether, this comprehensive research provides rich mixed-method data from which to understand individual perspectives and stories within the larger context of emerging patterns and integrated influences throughout the process of religious conversion. This inclusive approach provides broad insights as to why and how former atheists rejected belief in God, became open to consider the possibility of another perspective, and how they came to believe and live as if God exists and Christianity is true. It also stands as a counter-narrative to prevailing negative voices that belief in God is not intellectually and existentially plausible, attractive, relevant, and good. Rather, it shows that belief can be and is held by intellectual, educated people, even by those who would have never considered it possible. This investigation into the lives and language of former atheists provides a unique and fresh understanding of atheism and religious conversion with implications for the researcher, the professor, the apologist, and the evangelist who seek to understand belief formation and change between nearly opposite worldviews in a more integrated, holistic, and practical way.” ((Jana S. Harmon, Atheists Finding God: Unlikely Stories of Conversions to Christianity in the Contemporary West, 151–156 (Kindle Edition): Lanham, Maryland: Lexington Books)
Some things here are worthy of notice.
First, the importance of building a home upon God’s Word cannot be overstated. What is needed more than anything is for husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, to lay a solid foundation for their relationships upon the Word of God. It is when homes are built upon the Bible that they have the ability to reach the fullness of joyful potential that God desires for His people.
Second, it is also reassuring to notice that even though broken homes can be a factor in lack of faith in the world, we are still able to see the grace of God exhibited. It is encouraging to remember that the Word of God contains many examples of what we would call “dysfunctional homes.” In fact, as one Bible scholar has noted, this seems in many ways to be the norm especially in the Book of Genesis!
“Genesis is filled with human drama that touches and helps every one of us on a personal level. For example, every family in Genesis is what we today would call dysfunctional. I regard this as a divine gift. If your family is dysfunctional, the fact that all the families in Genesis are dysfunctional should provide you with some solace. I think the Bible is telling us that family dysfunction is a normal—though not necessarily inevitable—part of the human condition. Indeed, all of Genesis is a statement of how troubled the human condition is. The rest of the Bible, especially the next four books, provides solutions to the troubled human condition. To put it in medical terms, Genesis describes the patient’s (the human being’s) pathology, and the books that follow offer the wisdom and moral instruction necessary to cure the patient.” (Dennis Prager, The Rational Bible: Genesis, 15-16 (Kindle Edition): Washington, D.C.: Regnery Faith)
If you are reading this as a parent or spouse who has failed in some way, yield yourself to the grace of God Who is still working in the world and Who loves you and can work in your family and situation in ways that you may not fully understand. None is perfect except the Savior, and He came to this world to bring salvation for sinful and “dysfunctional” persons.
1 Timothy 1:15-This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief.
Mark 16:15-16-And He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. 16 He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned.
Third, these facts remind us that there is often far more to atheism than intellectual bias. Indeed, the facts demonstrate that children are born with an understanding that there is a Creator. It is often the events that occur in life which bitter us against the Lord.
“SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH on children’s developing minds and supernatural beliefs suggests that children normally and rapidly acquire minds that facilitate belief in supernatural agents. Particularly in the first year after birth, children distinguish between agents and nonagents, understanding agents as able to move themselves in purposeful ways to pursue goals. They are keen to find agency around them, even given scant evidence. Not long after their first birthday, babies appear to understand that agents, but not natural forces or ordinary objects, can create order out of disorder. Before children start school, they see the natural world as purposefully designed—even in ways that religious parents would not teach or endorse. This tendency to see function and purpose, plus an understanding that purpose and order come from minded beings, makes children likely to see natural phenomena as intentionally created. Who is the creator? Children know people are not good candidates. It must have been a god. Gods are not just humans with the ability to make mountains, trees, and butterflies, however. Early default assumptions about minded agents make it easy for children to understand gods as having full-access knowledge, superperception, superpower, immortality, and perhaps moral goodness. In fact, on some of these dimensions, children show the capability of reasoning in a theologically accurate way before being able to reason accurately about human beings on the same dimensions. This collection of religious ideas is among the features of what I call natural religion. In this chapter, I describe natural religion and also how it deviates from theological beliefs. Though children have strong natural tendencies toward religion generally, these tendencies do not inevitably propel them toward any one religion. They still have a lot to learn.” (Justin L. Barrett, Born Believers: The Science of Children’s Religious Belief, 135-136 (Kindle Edition): New York, NY: Free Press
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Belief in God and His Word is far from anti-intellectual. True faith is based upon the evidence of His Being all around us: for in Him, we live, and move and have our Being (Acts 17:26-28: cf. Romans 1:18-20).
The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Spirit, be with you all. Amen.